Pads Pod Episode 26: Keeping it 100

On this very special episode of Pads Pod, we speak to Kirk Kenney, sportswriter for the San Diego Union Tribune about his new book 100 Things Padres Fans Should Know & Do Before They Die. Kirk shares his favorite Tony memory, his thoughts on the current state of the Padres and discusses some fascinating tidbits of Padres lore from the book.

We highly encourage you to check out the book for yourself.  You can purchase it on Amazon or

After the interview, we talk about how reading the book lead to a revelation about the Padres identity.

Pads Pad Episode 16: Be A Penguin

After an extended matrimonial induced break, Pads Pod is back. We discuss what went wrong this season. What are we satisfied with? What changes do we want to see moving forward into 2016? Also, we muse about the infamous and erotic Padres cops and robbers photo.

Pads Pod Episode 15: Fire in the Rain

On this episode of Pads Pod, we discuss AJ’s refusal to sell at the trade deadline. The team visits Manny in New York to play the Mets and we get some insight on what AJ told the players at the end of that series. We also prepare for a Padres World Series, 30 for 30 documentary, and some special olympics.

Pads Pod Episode 11: Try Hard

On this episode of Pads Pod, we discuss possible tension brewing in the clubhouse.  We also opine about the Padres radio and TV broadcast teams.

Below, you’ll find the video of James Shields and Matt Kemp that we reference in the podcast.  Consider it Exhibit A that there might be some unrest among Padres players.


*We recorded this podcast just before the Dodgers series.  Therefore, we don’t discuss the Bud Black firing.  Look for comments on that shit sandwich in two weeks (we are taking a week off because Manny’s lazy ass in going on vacation in scary foreign country).

Game notes: Rockies 3, Padres 14 (5-1)

On May Day, the Padres showed their solidarity with the proletariate by getting to work. They dispatched with the capitalist scum Rockies by a score of 14-3.

Derek Norris proving me right / Yan Solarte proving Manny right

On the last episode of the podcast, I said Derek Norris is the Padre I’d most like to have at the plate with the World Series on the line.  Tonight, he gave further credibility to my statement with a solid single up the middle to score Justin Upton from third in the 4th inning.  Dude is batting damn over .600 with runners in scoring position.  After his RBI, I started bragging to other Pads Pod members about how my choice was spot on.  Then Yan Solarte, who was Manny’s choice for most clutch, came up and, after what seemed like hours after Norris’ at bat, slapped a two RBI single up the middle as well.  Solarte is also batting over .600 with RISP.  Although it wasn’t exactly a clutch situation, he came up in the 8th, with the game already in blow-out status, and singled home two more RBIs to take his total to 16 (sorry Jedd). Norris came up later that inning and doubled home Kemp. The race for the title of Mr. Clutch continues…

Chill the fuck out on the pitching

Our starters have, for the most part, been very good.  The bullpen will regress to the mean.  Fucking relax.  Do you think Kimbrel, Quack and Vincent are going to maintain ERAs near 5.00?  Hell to the no.  Furthermore, most of the relievers that caused us a shitload of damage are not currently on the 25 man roster (Kelley, Mazzoni, Rearick). I’m not saying this team doesn’t have some significant deficiencies, but, over the course of the season, I highly doubt the bullpen will be one of them.  Twitter can be a depressing place.  It’s hard to get perspective, but I really think we will be fine.  If I end up being wrong then I’ll just go fuck myself.

Self esteem

This was exactly the game our bullpen needed.  They were able to take over with an ample lead and get themselves right.  It was great to be able to get Quack in there in a low-pressure situation in the 7th.  He handled the situation with aplomb. I hope you don’t know what that word means because I’m doubtful that I used it correctly. Anyways, he sat those assholes down 1-2-3, and that’s gotta be great for his, and the entire pen’s, confidence going forward. Dale Thayer then came in, and continued to do his thing.  Nick Vincent took over in the 9th and had some trouble getting the final out, but overall I think it was a positive night for Padres relievers.

Upton’s base running

He went first to third early in the game. Then, he stole a base in the 7th after getting on base with an infield single. Showing he can compliment his power game with some small ball.

Game Notes: Dodgers 1, Padres 3 (4-26)

The Padres demoralized a pitiful looking Dodgers team on Military Sunday by taking the final game of the series by a score of 3-1. Although the Dodgers won the series, it is now clear that these teams are headed in opposite directions.  The Dodgers will win no other games this season, while the Padres will win them all.  Game notes:

Glen Hoffman acting spracked

What’s the deal Hoffy? Chill out, broseph.  In the first inning, he sent Solarte home after a double by Kemp.  Solarte was coming from first base, and Pedersen had the ball before Yan had even reached third. So why risk it with Upton coming up?  Probably because he, like we do, believes this team can do defy logic and physics. For example, I believe that one day Jedd Gyorko will hit the ball hard and it will not go directly into an infielder’s glove.  Like Climate Change deniers, I will continue to believe this despite all scientific evidence to the contrary.

Upton’s defense

Great diving catch in the 3rd.  This fool is going to make so much money on the free agent market.  I hold out some slight semblance of hope that AJ will find a way to keep him.  But, whatever methods our rockstar GM ends up employing towards those ends, I’m sure they will be extremely unethical.

Alexi perplexi

After Friday’s game I wrote that Alexi didn’t deserve to be our starting shortstop this season.  He called me after the game that night and was like:

“What the fuck Pads Pod?  Why are you saying that shit about me?”

And, I was like “Alexi, I’m sorry but it’s just my opinion.  If you don’t like it, why don’t you go out there and show me I’m wrong?”

And he was like, “Alright, bitch. Watch what I’m fixin’ to do on Sunday.”

I thought he was just heated and talking nonsense that he couldn’t back up, but apparently he was serious. Lesson learned: continue saying that Alexi isn’t quite good enough to be our starting shortstop.

Two on, two out, bottom of the ninth World Series Game 7, tied:

If I could choose any Padres player to bat in this situation, with all due respect to Kemp and Upton, I, without hesitation, would choose Derek Norris. His offense won the game for us today (and he threw out a runner in the first, and made a great throw on a dropped 3rd strike in the 9th to get Adrian). Derek only just turned 26, and with Austin Hedges starting to hit at El Paso, the Padfather (AJ) has some interesting decisions to make in the coming years.

The 8th and 9th the way they should be

Today we saw our dreams realized.  A perfect, dominating, no nonsense final two innings from Benoit and Kimbrel.  When the Kimbrel trade was first announced, fantasies swirled in my head of opposing teams sobbing and shaking their heads as they realized that trailing the Padres after the 7th inning meant their feeble efforts had all been in vain. Rarely do we the idealized world inside our minds come to fruition.  But, this is the 2015 Padres, bitches.  Get used to it.

Three Adorable Tweets from Odrisamer Despaigne

With Ian Kennedy’s return to the rotation today, let’s take a minute to think about the man who did such a wonderful job of filling in for him.  If Odrisamer Despaigne  isn’t one of your favorite Padres, you’re a cold hearted son-of-a-gun.  Here are three adorable tweets from him.  Let the cute tingles flow through your body.

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Game Notes: Dodgers 3, Padres 0 (4-24)

The Padres scored zero runs, but the Dodgers scored three.  Therefore, according to the rules of baseball, the Dodgers were awarded a win.  According to the rules of life, the Dodgers were sent to hell for all eternity because they are comprised of 25 complete and utter pieces of shit. Games notes:

Alexi is depressing

I like Amarista.  He just shouldn’t be our starting shortstop for this magnificent season.  He killed two rallies in the early innings. With the bases loaded in the 2nd he struck out.  Anything but a strikeout there totally alters the game. Our 6  and 7 batters (Norris and Middlebrooks) were getting on, but Alexi coming to the plate he just deflates the situation.  His mere presence seemed to settle Greinke down.  Can’t have that shit.  Not this year.  Despite a well turned double play today, his defense isn’t spectacular enough to warrant his lack of offense. Let’s go all in nab someone significantly better.  I know you’re reading this, AJ.  Come on, bro.

Cashner throwing baseballs well

Cash looked great all night.  Don’t be mistaken, the Dodgers lineup is hella solid one through eight (one through nine with Greinke on the mound).  With the exception of the Crawford homerun in the 7th, Dodger hitters were rarely able to square up his offerings. He got Douche-mani Grandal to ground into a key double play in the 6th and had six strikeouts on the night.  Although his previous starts this season felt kinda sketchy, he’s throwing up a 2.63 ERA. Not bad from your 3rd starter.  He also took a hack with the bases loaded in 2nd that sent him into a spinning corkscrew. Though such displays are not surprising from Andrew, they continue to be endearing.

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