The Cosmic Oneness of Mark Kotsay
Mark Kotsay is the Padres new hitting coach. We love Mark Kotsay.
In fact, Kotsay is the epitome of what we love about baseball. Watching him play you feel a connection with him that can only come from a game free of helmets, shoulder pads and face masks.
He’s just a dude. But, importantly, especially during his 2001-2002 stint with the Padres, he was one of the most talented dudes. Even more importantly, although he was excellent, you always felt that having fun, a few beers, and shooting the shit was slightly more important than working hard and being serious. If you look at this picture and even begin to disagree with us, you are stupid ass piece of shit. Mark Kotsay loves life and beer. Period.
For some reason, in our opinion, this quality of excellence and nonchalance usually combines for a sick ass human being.
All that being said, do these qualities that make up a likeable ball player also make up an effective hitting coach?
The Padres previous few hitting coaches have been more grizzled, serious types. While fools such as that may inspire more confidence on paper, they obviously haven’t done a god damn thing to improve our offense. Of course, it must be said that the above mentioned ineffectiveness may simply be a result of total incompetence on the players part.
Whatever the case, Kotsay has stated that he is mainly there to inspire confidence and provide reassurance. With an excellent group of hitters such as Upton, Kemp, Norris, and another group consisting of the likes of Myers and Middlebrooks who have performed in the past, but currently lack confidence, what better task for a man who appreciates the warm glow of alcohol and the simple ecstasy of life? Here at Pads Pod, we believe that despite Mark Kotsay’s stellar career, he will find his true calling as a hitting coach. In life, the best ‘atta boys’ come from simple people who’ve had a few domestic beers and truly understand the cosmic oneness of being. In other words, the best ‘atta boys’ come from Mark Kotsay.